Ali's Engagement Party

Last night, I attended the engagement party of one of the PE teachers here at the school. Wow, what a night! It took place in a huge meeting hall of sorts in the Christian neighborhood of Ainkawa, and all we did all night was dance in giant circles around the room, Greek wedding style, to energetic Kurdish music- which sounds a lot like house music, strangely, and dancing to it involves a lot of shoulder action. Besides the circle dancing, everyone gets up at one point during the ceremony, crowds around the engaged couple, and takes zillions of pictures of them with their point-and-shoot digital cameras while the bride opens her dowry-like gifts of gold jewelry. Really, nothing else happened besides those two activities. 

The bride-to-be was beautifully made-up and wearing a glittery chartreuse-green traditional dress that set off her porcelain skin beautifully along with all the gold jewelry, and the groom- who I'd only ever seen before with gym clothes on- was dashing and unrecognizable in his tuxedo. I groaned inwardly when I saw his kid brother who is in my KG class, because I knew that he was going to be tired and cranky the next day from staying up all night and partying. Little Miran, though, I've come to adore. He is spoiled and stubborn, rambunctious and in dire need of tough love, but I like his fire; he's got lots of spunk that kid, and because of that, I'm not afraid to pull little pranks on him like giving him stickers that say “good girl!” on it and dying with laughter inwardly as he proudly shows it off to his little classmates, unaware of its meaning. 

The reason why the groom's kid brother is so much younger than him is because their father has two wives, and the little one comes from the second wife. I asked one of the PE teachers if she found it weird that men had more than one wife, and she said she didn't like it, but in fact, they can have up to 4! (That's 4, exclamation mark, not 4 factorial mind you.) The same fate of “husband-sharing” could befall this lovely bride-to-be who everyone says has been in love with him, and he with her, for 9 whole years. This is the ugly truth- or culture, if you wish to call it so-, that having multiple wives is totally possible and acceptable in this culture in which a man can remain “free” even after he ties the knot with the one he says he loves. While, of course, the woman is bound, by pain of all things terrible, to being ever-faithful. That said, here is the lovely couple: